Chop Wood, Carry Water

Chop Wood, Carry Water

I just got back from a long weekend in North Carolina at our annual International Training Camp for my martial arts style, Cuong Nhu. People have asked me why I, someone who centers her life around peace, nonviolence, healing, and love, has been practicing martial arts for the past 9 years. The answer? I have found my martial arts practice rich with life lessons, epiphanies, and spiritual awakenings. As my two spiritual teachers Tacey and Bloom Post have reminded me again and again, THIS moment is where the answers are, THIS moment is where the connections are, THIS moment is where the sacredness is. In other words, THIS moment is IT. And since I spend so much time doing karate, then, just like every moment, karate is IT. So, with that in mind, this past weekend has been an incredible, though not always easy, reminder and confirmation of some lessons that have been at the forefront of my life:

~If you build it, they will come.
This year, for the first time, I taught a class at Training Camp, and I taught my Martial Arts for Women as a Spiritual Practice class. To put it mildly, this was very different from the other classes all weekend— and I knew that it could be completely empty. However, I also knew that this is who I am, and this is what I have to offer the world, and if the right people were there, they would come. Eight students came—a great turnout for a first-time offering. Be true to yourself, even if you think no one else will get it. If you build it, they will come.

~Student Mind
My Martial Arts for Women as a Spiritual Practice class included eight women, one of them a fourth-degree blackbelt. I am a first-degree blackbelt. I was nervous when I saw her belt, as clearly she has been doing this a whole lot longer than me, and what did I have to teach her? Well, true to her rank (which isn’t always the case), she was an amazing student. She was gracious, open, and engaged. She did not try to lead or teach anyone anything and instead held space for all of us with her incredible energy. We all have so much to learn from each other. Be open to the grace of Student Mind.

~Going straight through the fire
One of the classes I took was Boxing. At one point, the Master who was teaching us told us to partner up and we would be slapping our partner in the face to get used to being hit. A little background: In my family, as kids, we were slapped in the face often, and if we put up our hands or defended ourselves in any way, it was ten times worse. We had to allow ourselves to be hit. So, the thought of someone slapping me without me defending myself had me walking away to sit this one out. However, Spirit didn’t have that in mind. Just as I was walking away, a young man (maybe 20) stepped in front of me and asked me to be his partner. And here I was, being given a clear choice. Tell him no thank you, keep walking away, and have this very painful part of my past continue to resurface until I can face it, OR accept, go straight through the fire with a complete stranger but in a safe, nonviolent situation, and maybe, just maybe, make it to the other side for the first time in forty years. In a split second I decided it was time, and I accepted. I can’t say it was easy—it wasn’t. I can’t say I want to do it again—I don’t. But I can say that I felt a major shift. And I gave the kid a huge hug at the end (he was like what??) and didn’t cry until I was back at my room. You can avoid the fire all you want, but the only real way is going straight through it.

~Shifting Perspective
A week before we left to drive to North Carolina, I had a flat tire and had to replace that tire. Then, three days before we left, I had another tire go flat, and I had to replace it, too. Then, when we got to North Carolina, one of the new tires I had just bought started losing air (turned out to be punctured) and I had to replace it again. About $500 later, I was not happy. My amazing friend Laurie took me to the tire shop down the street from Training Camp to pick it up, and the more I complained, the more I came to realize how incredibly lucky I was to be sitting in an air-conditioned car, my friend listening to me vent, and to NOT be on the side of the road in the mountains of North Carolina with a flat, at midnight, kids in the car as semis barreled past us. That one shift in perspective changed everything, and I was filled with gratitude. Everything can be shifted to a new perspective that serves you. Everything.

~Women are changing the world
Over and over during weekend, even though there are a majority of men in the style, I was reminded how women are doing what comes naturally and it is affecting all aspects of this planet: the young woman sensei who was telling me about how she is being led to teach martial arts to the non-athletes, those who it doesn’t come easy to, as well as those who have been physically abused, have mental health issues, or other perceived “weaknesses;” the Master who is about my age who was talking about how sparring isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, and that recognizing that it’s most often an ego boost is important to acknowledge; the new woman student who wants to eventually take karate back to her home country where women are oppressed and teach them about empowering themselves from the inside out—not how to hurt someone who is attacking you, although that may be a side effect of the training, but rather how to come to KNOW that you are incredibly powerful from your internal source of power and you do NOT have to give that away—to anyone. Women are changing the world, one thought, one action at a time.

THIS moment is IT. 
IT is THIS moment.
Chop wood, carry water.